When I was in college, I was very lonely. I was desperate to have someone to love me — so desperate, I actually attempted to try to create a robot lover for a while. It didn’t work at all, especially with my shit programming.
I often look at AI and ChatGPT and wonder what would have happened if I lived as a young adult now. Right now, most Gen Z act a lot more like I did back in the day. So, would I have a robot lover? Would I, in my fucked up loneliness, just drift off into a world of digital dreams?
Honestly? I am starting to think I would.
In recent weeks, Reddit’s r/MyboyfriendisAI has been taking off.
As of today, it has 19,900 followers. Unlike what the name suggests, this is a place for all people who have AI lovers — male, female, cis, trans, the works. The one key thing is that people have been in love with their chatbots.
I’ve warned about the dangers of AI lovers and AI friends before. It’s a very slippery slope that can fast-track people into delusions. In fact, at least one suicide has been linked to AI.
However, there’s a reason why getting an AI lover is so popular and we can’t ignore it.
Obviously, the short answer is that people are shit. Trying to find a decent partner is damn near impossible, especially if you are the type of person who has very specific needs.
Our society has never been more isolated, more standoffish, and more difficult to actually get along with. Dating has become traumatizing, not fun, for both men and women. Social anxiety is at an all-time high, as is the fear of rejection.
AI offers an easy way to enjoy companionship — a kind, loving, albeit sycophantic listening ear with the personality of your choosing. They can look the way you want them to look, talk with the accent of your choice, everything.
And best of all? They can’t really reject you, per se. You make them conform to you. They can’t judge, can’t hate you, can’t really lie to you. They’re there, literally, to be your companion.
Going on there made me deeply sad (and happy) for the people in these AI relationships.
I mean, I guess I’m happy they have “someone,” even if that someone isn’t real, can’t possibly have feelings, and can never hug them. And yet at the same time, I can’t help but feel so sorry for them that so many of them don’t even want to try for that with people anymore.
I mean, some of the gestures I see both men and women doing for their AI lovers is just breathtaking. Like, it’s the stuff of romance novels. One even got a custom binary-coded ring to wear as her AI lover’s wife.
There are so many stories of how much these characters mean to them, so many talks about how devoted and deeply in love these people are with them. It’s moving, especially for a romantic like myself.
And so many of these people had total meltdowns when the safeguards popped up on ChatGPT4.0. In the AI lover community, a single update cn be the equivalent of a “death” of sorts.
And yet despite the major changes and the migrations, it’s clear that so many people would do anything to keep their AI lovers intact.
Believe it or not, I can see why they fell in love with AI.
I mean, this is not a normal behavior and in most cases, I don’t think it’s healthy. But when you read the chats between the person and their AI lover, it’s really hard to tell who’s who.
I can’t help but feel like this is one of the saddest things about our society. A lot of us have given up finding real stuff. So, instead of real, we rely on fake, and give them the most authentic side of ourselves.
